Mother's Day 2010

As Mother’s Day comes to a close I have the chance to reflect on all its meaning and significance in my life. Today is a work day for me, a minister. As I began this day and led in worship, my mind was attuned to the necessary elements that had to be carried out—roses and bibles for baby dedication, appropriate remarks for mothers, being sensitive for those whose mothers had died and those who want desperately to be mothers. In over twenty years of ministry many Mother’s Days were spent without me seeing my mother, but always calling her.

So this evening I remember my mother. This is now the fifth Mother’s Day since her death. I miss hearing her voice and reassuring words. I miss her smile that always told me I was loved. I miss her hugs. I miss seeing the thrill in her face when her grandchildren visited. I miss trips to O’Charley’s Restaurant after a doctor’s visit. I miss conversations about what was going on in life and her advice and wisdom that she would offer. I miss her stories of times growing up in a coal mining camp. Most of all, I miss having her around.

There are many stories I recall of my mother—stories that reveal grace, humor, joy, and sadness. I have and will continue to share those stories with my family and friends, especially her grandchildren. Though they knew her for only a few short years, through those stories they will truly know the wonderful mother she was.

So on this Mother’s Day I share a part of an essay written by John Killinger. I have used it for several years and no long remember it’s source. I dedicate it to my mother, Dolores Valentine (1929-2005).

I believe in the love of all mothers and its importance in the lives of the children they bear.

It is stronger than steel, softer than down, and more resilient than a green sapling on a hillside.

It closes wounds, melts disappointments, and enables the weakest child to stand tall and straight in the fields of adversity.

I believe that this love, even at its best, is only a shadow of the love of God . . .

And I believe that one of the most beautiful sights in the world is a mother who lets this greater love flow through her to her child,

Blessing the world with the tenderness of her touch and the tears of her joy.

--John Killinger

A Baby Dedication

I have performed parent/child dedications throughout my twenty plus years of ministry. Usually such events happen on Mother’s Day and occasionally Father’s Day, and sometimes on Sundays closer to a child’s birth. The parent/child dedication I participated in today had quite a unique twist.

First, it wasn’t on Sunday, it was Tuesday. Second, it wasn’t in a church. It took place in a meeting room in a very nice restaurant. Third, a congregation had not gathered. Instead, about a dozen family members came together for this festive event.

But there’s more. Perhaps telling the story more fully will help. When I pastored a church in Prestonsburg my wife and I became close to several families with whom we have kept contact on one level or another throughout the years. This particular family, at the time I served there, had two boys in the youth group. Our families spent time together and enjoyed the friendship that developed.

I received a call from the mother recently that their youngest son had joined the National Guard and his unit was to be deployed following the holidays. She explained that he and his wife had just celebrated the arrival of their first child and wanted to dedicate the baby before he left on his deployment. They wanted me to perform the dedication. Of course, I was honored to be part of this family’s special day and appreciated the opportunity to continue my ministry with them.

We worked out the dates and other arrangements and gathered for the small, informal ceremony that proved to be quite meaningful and worshipful. The baby was adorable, the parents proud, and the grandparents were glowing. As I held this nearly six-month old in my arms and sought God’s blessings and peace on his life I thought of the many ways this baby would need God in the years ahead. As I asked his parents and grandparents to commit to sharing with him the story of God’s love I marveled at the wonderful privilege and responsibility this is.

The ceremony itself was brief. Afterwards we shared a wonderful meal and great conversation, catching up on the time that had passed since we had last met.

I spoke privately with the young man who was soon to be deployed—he hadn’t changed much from the way I remember him as a youth. I inquired as to how he felt for his safety while deployed. He told me that his unit’s assignment was actually among the most dangerous. He is scheduled to be away for one year.

During that time his son will learn to walk, begin to talk, and go on adventures without his dad. And his dad, and his family, will face some daunting challenges—fear, loneliness, discouragement, and the absence of family.

I am grateful for all those who make a sacrifice many of us cannot imagine. Whether we agree with the deployment of troops or not, they certainly deserve our prayers and support as they faithfully serve our country.

Before I left I pledged my prayers for him and his family. And I realized we had done more than dedicate a child. We had helped a family prepare for a husband, father, and son to leave. I hope to hear of his safe return this time next year.

Ordination

Our church, Lexington Avenue Baptist, recently ordained one of our own to the gospel ministry. She spent her adolescent years growing and learning from the caring ministers and members of this nurturing community of faith. She opened her life and her spirit to voice of God calling her into ministry. And she responded affirmatively and confidently to that call.

She is a God-gifted young person who possesses a compassion for those who are hurting and is able to convey the love of Christ through her ministry and her service. I am grateful that she was willing to hear and respond to God’s call upon her life.

I am also grateful to a church that nurtured that calling in her life. That’s part of the work and the mission of the church—to find ways to help others to hear God’s voice in the midst of their lives. That certainly happens in churches everywhere. It requires sometimes that people like you and me open our hearts and our lives in such a way that we can hear—but it can and does happen.

Ministry is about giving your life in service to God and to others. It can be draining and exhausting at times. There are days as a minister when you realize that the work of ministry is never really finished. There can also be days when you wonder if you have what it takes to be of service to others.

Yet ministry is at the same time very rewarding and fulfilling. It brings meaning and purpose to life. And ministry is a reminder that this, whatever this is, is never about you—it is always about God and what God is doing in and through you and others.

Katie Lay-Anderson is and will be a wonderful minister of the gospel of Jesus Christ. I am honored that we had the chance to be part of what God is doing in and through her. Thanks be to God!

Tenth Anniversary at LABC

I recently celebrated my tenth anniversary as pastor of the Lexington Avenue Baptist Church. This wonderful church recognized me and my family with special guests from previous churches I have served and with a very generous gift. It may sound like a cliché, but it really is hard to believe it has been ten years.

In that time my children have grown. We came to Danville with a preschooler and an infant. We celebrated our tenth anniversary with a teenager and a pre-teen. All that is to say that I have aged as well. But that’s another matter!!

In those ten years I have grown as a person and as a minister. I would like to say that I am wiser and perhaps in some ways I am. I have certainly learned to do things I had not previously done.

My ten years have been enriched by a wonderful group of folks with whom I minister. Our church staff is tremendous—and I don’t say that lightly. They are a gifted and called group of individuals. Each of them helps me to be a better minister. And each of them helps our church to be a better church.

Ten years can seem like a very long time. It can also be a time that passes very quickly. But more than anything else these ten years have given me a wealth of memories and stories that I will treasure for years to come.

Thanks be to God for those ten years!

Remembering

Today, October 12th, marks the 27th anniversary of my brother’s death. He was 21 when he died as the result of a car accident. I was 17. That event left me and my family changed in ways we could not immediately see. We continued to live life fully and in time we rediscovered the joy that life brings. David’s life, though short in years, was lived fully and touched the lives of others.

There are those events in life that serve as road markers in this journey. They are not what define us as individuals. Our lives are more the culmination of such markers. Rather, those road markers serve as reference points that help us to better understand who we have become and, perhaps, why we have become who we are. At times, those road markers become the points at which we choose one path over another. At other times those same markers become the points at which a certain path is thrust upon us.

David’s death was all that for me. As I look back over the years I can see the ways in which David’s death and life, and what I learned from that experience, have influenced my life.

I have learned that though we lose loved ones in death, there is much life yet to be lived, and live it we must. I have found great joy and blessings in the continuing journey of life—a wonderful wife, two beautiful children, moments filled with laughter and tears. All of this is a reminder that life is a gift.

There are many road markers in my life’s journey. Each one has had its own unique impact on me. But on this day I pause to remember David’s life and the times we shared together. For that remembrance, I give God thanks.

My Top Five Burgers

I had lunch today with some friends and in the process decided on my top five burgers. And so, in no particular order my top five burgers.

I begin with Billy Ray’s Playhouse Burger. A Prestonsburg favorite. I had this burger often during my five years in that wonderful town. Billy Ray was a real person—I knew both him and his mother. The playhouse was actually a pool room in an earlier time. Some of the old-timers in town could remember that earlier time. There were pictures of various community figures and locations on the walls. Included were the pictures of the school students killed when a school bus went off the road into a flooded creek during the 50s. The burgers are hand patted and grilled.

Second, burgers from Five Guys Burgers and Fries. I ran onto this place while on a family vacation in Washington, D.C. It has become one of my favorites. They recently opened a restaurant in Lexington near where I live. The fries are deep-fried in peanut oil. Great burgers and a great place.

Third, the Dream Catcher Burger from Stan’s Fish Sandwich. I know what you’re thinking. A great burger in a fish joint? It’s true! I had it just today. It is 100% grass-fed angus beef. Seasoned wonderfully. Topped with Swiss cheese, it makes for a great lunch!!

Fourth, Old Bridge Golf Club Grill Cheeseburger. I could eat this burger every week. Just the thought of it makes my mouth water. May have to go to Old Bridge tomorrow!!

Fifth, Jennifer’s hand-patted angus burgers with special fillings. Don’t know what all the special fillings are but onions are part of it. Throw them on the grill and these are great.

Obviously I like hamburgers. American cheese or swiss cheese is a must. Douse them with ketchup, mayonnaise, and sometimes mustard. Add a large glass of southern-style sweet tea and that’s a perfect lunch.

I think I’ll start dreaming now about tomorrow’s lunch

Fall is Here

The signs are clear—fall is in the air. Leaves are beginning to fall off some trees. The weather is cooler—at least where I live. Football games fill the weekend. Plans are in the making for fall festivals, trips to the pumpkin patch, and hayrides. Favorite chili recipes are being shared.

I have always liked the fall season. It ranks as one of my favorites. I don’t have anything against the other seasons. Nor do I have any specific reason for choosing the fall as my favorite. Perhaps the memories associated with the fall have something to do with it.

Those memories include homecoming parades, school festivals, cutting and splitting fire-wood, Friday night high school football games. Sweaters and sweat-shirts are taken off the closet shelf and out of summer storage.

The writer of Ecclesiastes reminds us that “there is a time for everything.” (Eccl. 3:1 NIV) Perhaps what I like about Fall is that it reminds me to slow down life’s pace; to take time to reflect and to grow. I don’t have any particular plans for this season; a lot of hopes perhaps but no firm plans. A trip to the mountains as the vibrant colors begin to set in would be nice. A Saturday afternoon drive would be nice. A trip to the pumpkin patch would create great memories, even though my kids are getting past the age of enjoying such a trip. A weekend get-away with my wife would be great. But no such plans are set yet. Spontaneity may a good thing this year.

This season won’t last. It will give way to winter and winter to spring. Life will continue its ebb and flow. But for now I will soak in all that this Fall has to offer. I will, as I seek to do each season, enjoy the good times Fall brings and learn from the difficult lessons that may come in this seasons journey. I pray that the good days far outweigh the more difficult days.

Fall is here. I welcome its return like an old friend.